There's an episode of "Friends" in the second half of the series, at Monica and Chandler's wedding, where Rachel thinks she's pregnant but can't bear to find out one way or another because she's not sure if it's something she wants. Phoebe picks up the pregnancy test, and tells her that it's negative. As Rachel comes to grips with it, she realizes that she's grieving something she never had in the first place - until Phoebe tells her that she lied and it's positive. "Now you know how you really feel about it!"
Last summer, Shally tested positive for a child for the first time. At the time, it was more of a pleasant surprise - we had talked about having children, but considering the stories we'd heard from other couples that had taken years to conceive, we didn't think that we'd be able to conceive so soon. While we were excited, I'd confess that on my part at least, there was a little bit of rote-ness in the whole process. In a sense, I felt like it was time for me to become a father, but I didn't necessarily want to become a father - instead, it was just the right time for the next step.
Three weeks after the positive test, we lost the baby to a miscarriage.
It was surprising how much we were crushed emotionally by this. Even though Beebee - our codename for the child - was only a brief presence in our lives for such a short period of time, it did feel like a death in the family as we grieved. To be sure, our season of grief and healing was correspondingly shorter than if it was a loved one we had known for a much longer time, but it was no less intense. We're thankful for the support of the family and friends who prayed for and supported us in that season.
Now that we are entering the third trimester of our current pregnancy (codename: Junior), I realized that if Beebee had managed to stick, we would be hitting our due date around this time. A few reflections...
1) Most significantly, losing the first pregnancy hammered home the fact that I really do want to become a father. There's no more feeling of "it's about the right time" - I'm simultaneously thrilled and terrified.
2) There have been few instances where I've felt more helpless and not in control than when the miscarriage was progressing over a day. We wrestled with anxiety and denial while trying to pray and hope for a miracle that didn't happen. There was absolutely nothing that we could do. It has been a continuing test of faith to learn how to trust in God for things that we have no control over. Interestingly, it has also afforded the opportunity to identify with and encourage some friends in their own situations of helplessness.
3) We are much more appreciative and fully aware of how fortunate we are that it was not difficult for us to conceive again. We both have several friends and family who had/have tried for years to have children and have been continually frustrated. Our heart and prayers go out to them.
4) Finally, we understand a little bit more about how a miscarriage can affect prospective parents. A few years ago, we heard from some friends that they were experiencing one, and it was difficult to empathize at the time. It is so helpful to have the support of a community in grief and healing, and one reason I wanted to write this in a public space is in the hope that anyone who has to go through the unfortunate experience of a miscarriage - either their own or a loved one's - would know that we can try to help.
There's a daily joy and anticipation that we experience looking forward to Junior's arrival, and for the most part we don't think too often about Beebee anymore. But she (we arbitrarily decided that she was a she) is part of our lives now, and we do want to remember and mourn her regularly.
Showing posts with label faith. Show all posts
Showing posts with label faith. Show all posts
Tuesday, April 19, 2011
Tuesday, March 01, 2011
A few thoughts on marriage
Today, my lovely wife and fellow parent-to-be celebrates her birthday. As we enjoyed food and dessert with a few of her friends, as well as looking forward to going out ourselves tomorrow, I'm reminded that marriage is this neat and mysterious thing.
I remember the long conversations late at night during college and after graduation, musing about our future spouses and the age-old question, "How do you know he/she's the one?" And while you might chalk it up to a checklist of qualities, a vision of flowers and sunshine, hormones, a voice from God, or some indefinable feeling, ultimately, we don't really know for sure. We just know what we know about each other, make a commitment based on that, then spend the rest of our lives working on making that commitment more and more sure day by day. Kind of like faith.
I know from friends' experiences and books that our marriage will be tested, perhaps severely, as we transition into this next stage of our lives, but I'm still glad that we get to do this together.
Happy birthday, honey.
I remember the long conversations late at night during college and after graduation, musing about our future spouses and the age-old question, "How do you know he/she's the one?" And while you might chalk it up to a checklist of qualities, a vision of flowers and sunshine, hormones, a voice from God, or some indefinable feeling, ultimately, we don't really know for sure. We just know what we know about each other, make a commitment based on that, then spend the rest of our lives working on making that commitment more and more sure day by day. Kind of like faith.
I know from friends' experiences and books that our marriage will be tested, perhaps severely, as we transition into this next stage of our lives, but I'm still glad that we get to do this together.
Happy birthday, honey.
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
Reactions to "Why Chinese Mothers Are Superior"
Since we're hoping to enter the realm of parenthood later this year, I've been following the various links and comments across Facebook on Why Chinese Mothers are Superior. As an Asian, an American, and also a Christian, there's an interesting confluence and clash of values, goals, and styles showing up. Some of my own brief reactions and thoughts on the article, and the numerous followup articles springing up all over the web...
- First, thanks to Andrew N and Andrew W for posting this comment thread that includes an email reply from the author, Amy Chua, to an upset reader, pointing out that she did not choose the title of the WSJ article excerpt, and that the excerpt is not necessarily indicative of the content of the book it is promoting. So, no need to demonize the author as this is all a (very successful!) marketing stunt. Still, a good topic to consider.
- Things that most everyone seem to agree on as good goals and principles for successful parenting of one's children:
- Development of a strong work ethic, delayed gratification, and other good habits (quote: "Tenacious practice, practice, practice is crucial for excellence; rote repetition is underrated in America.").
- Equip them to be able to be independent and self-supporting as adults.
- Discipline and tough love are often needed to teach/direct children to what is best for them and their future because they can't see it themselves.
- However, the various articles linked above are filled with testimonies of the damage that can be inflicted by the extreme aspects (in particular, insults, belittling, unreasonably high standards, and lack of praise/satisfaction) of the "Chinese" parenting style mentioned in the article:
- Chinese women have one of the highest rates of suicide and depression.
- Products of this childhood often include high achievers and materially successful adults who hate their parents.
- Personally, while I grew up with parents who helped set high goals for my brother and I, they generally did not resort to insults and belittling as motivators. Because of this, I never doubted my parents' love and trusted that they knew what was best for me. I would try to work hard to delight them because I wanted to. I hope to model that for my kids too. Some of the things they did that I can remember:
- Spending a lot of time patiently, firmly, but kindly teaching and working with me on things until I "got it".
- Praising effort as well as success - something that I think may be relatively unusual about my family.
- I'd like to believe that the "strengths-based" literature that has been gaining popularity in the business world over the last two decades or so can be applied to parenting as well. After the development of good habits and character (honesty, integrity), it seems to make sense that since each person has innate natural gifts and talents, after getting to a "competent" level in other areas, it is more worthwhile to hone and develop these natural gifts and talents rather than spending an inordinate amount of time becoming "Excellent" in everything. As several people have pointed out, academic excellence can lead to good doctors, lawyers, and engineers, but doesn't develop leaders and innovators.
- This means that at some point in the kid's development, in addition to character and work ethic development, we need some way of identifying gifts and talents to develop... which seems like the freedom, and perhaps the motivation, to experiment is needed.
- Brian L pointed out, and I agree, that another aspect of parenting I'd aspire to based on my own experience is helping my kid to avoid regrets later in life, because as adults with more experience, we can see and give personal testimony to things we wish we'd have done differently. Two personal examples:
- I didn't necessarily enjoy piano growing up, but it did give me a solid background and foundation in music that has helped nurture a great love and appreciation for many different types of music and instruments today. In the long view, I'm grateful that my parents introduced me to it.
- I wish I'd have made more of an effort to learn Mandarin when I had more opportunity and more ability to do so, and I'll probably make that known to my kids. Incidentally, it seems that while learning a language similar to English (like Spanish or French) is do-able in high school, learning an entirely different language like Mandarin is best undertaken either when very young when the brain is still developing, or intensively in college when there is greater desire.
- Finally, as a Christian, it is sobering to consider that my relationship with my kids will likely be the biggest influence on their view of their relationship with God. Judging by the comments and testimonies I've seen from Asian American Christian friends on this topic, many of us are still saddled with baggage from our pasts with overbearing parents and with Asian churches who seem to espouse similar values of conditional love based on obedience and success.
- How can we avoid this? I agree with Byron that one thing to be conscious of is that insults, berating, belittling, shame, etc. as motivation might be effective motivators, but at the cost of relationship. That being said, given human nature, I think it's almost unavoidable that at one point or another, the patience of a parent will give way to these things. In that case, it's equally as important to be able to apologize to our children and ask forgiveness, and not just assume that the ends justify the means.
- All in all, I hope and aspire that the unconditional love, acceptance, and approval that is available to me through Christ can be the foundation for all my relationships, especially with my children - and that the unconditional love they receive from their heavenly and earthly fathers can be the foundation for their lives as well.
Thursday, June 24, 2010
An amusing look at church names...
Been a long day and the posts I have in mind to write will take a bit more time to develop, so here's today's fun/humorous link for the day: A Church By Any Other Name. As new churches have sprung up in the last 15-20 years, trying to differentiate has become harder and harder, leading to more and more creative names. Since I recognize a lot of these names, this was a fun read, and something to not take too seriously, as the author poked equal-opportunity fun at how some of the names could be interpreted. Some of my favorites:
3. Radiance (Where the female vocalists all glitter like Mariah Carey.)
4. Elevation (U2 songs every bloody Sunday.)
8. enCompass (Wii th-|-nk [outside] the box. We R crAtiVe.)
9. Epiphany Station (Next stop, Conjunction Junction!)
14. The Rock (If film producer Michael Bay ever created a church…the pyrotechnics are amazing.)
30. Tapestry (Our pastor really loves that “the threads don’t make sense until you turn the cloth over” illustration.)
37. Warehouse 180 (If we can’t grow a church we’ll start a nightclub.)
46. The Well (The un-well best worship elsewhere.)
47. Jacob’s Well (Where bachelors hang out to find their future wives.)
51. Mercy Street (Where Sesame Street characters go for rehab. Cookie Monster has checked in 7 times.)
63. The Upper Room (Where we cling to our guns and religion and hide from the authorities.)
70. The Pursuit (Speed dating every Wednesday at 10 p.m.)
76. Compass (Our sermons have four points.)
84. Scum of The Earth (Finally some honesty in advertising.)
89. Overflow Church (For those who couldn't find a seat at the megachurch down the street.)
94. WestPoint (Praise the Lord. Pass the ammunition.)
3. Radiance (Where the female vocalists all glitter like Mariah Carey.)
4. Elevation (U2 songs every bloody Sunday.)
8. enCompass (Wii th-|-nk [outside] the box. We R crAtiVe.)
9. Epiphany Station (Next stop, Conjunction Junction!)
14. The Rock (If film producer Michael Bay ever created a church…the pyrotechnics are amazing.)
30. Tapestry (Our pastor really loves that “the threads don’t make sense until you turn the cloth over” illustration.)
37. Warehouse 180 (If we can’t grow a church we’ll start a nightclub.)
46. The Well (The un-well best worship elsewhere.)
47. Jacob’s Well (Where bachelors hang out to find their future wives.)
51. Mercy Street (Where Sesame Street characters go for rehab. Cookie Monster has checked in 7 times.)
63. The Upper Room (Where we cling to our guns and religion and hide from the authorities.)
70. The Pursuit (Speed dating every Wednesday at 10 p.m.)
76. Compass (Our sermons have four points.)
84. Scum of The Earth (Finally some honesty in advertising.)
89. Overflow Church (For those who couldn't find a seat at the megachurch down the street.)
94. WestPoint (Praise the Lord. Pass the ammunition.)
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
God's "still, small voice"
A bit late with my daily posting today...
My thought for the day comes from some contemplation on Scripture at the Internet Monk on the Christian cliche, God's "still, small voice" from 1 Kings 19:11-13, where the prophet Elijah, after doing some miracles and being chased/persecuted for several days, finds himself at the same mountain where Moses encountered God face-to-face. Depressed, frustrated, and lonely, Elijah complains about his plight to God, whereupon God responds with fabulous displays of power - a mighty wind, a powerful earthquake, and a raging fire, but "the Lord was not in the _______." Then after these, there is a still, small voice.
The common church interpretation/teaching of this passage is usually something along the lines of, we need to tune out the noise of this world to listen to God's still, small voice for direction, comfort, and assurance. However, the article writer does an interesting job of presenting an alternative perspective: rather than revealing a way that God speaks to us, the passage is instead a story about how God will typically not use spectacular displays of power to give us a "mountaintop experience" when we're depressed and down about life circumstances. Instead, it is "a call to simply go back to work, doing what God has called us to do, relying on his promises; trusting that the work is his and not ours to define and achieve."
I appreciated the challenge in the reading to consider context and the bigger story more deeply rather than locking in a particular phrase and adopting it as my own, and this particular call to go back to work that God has called me to do, trusting that the work is his and not mine, is an encouragement in the midst of what has been a difficult year.
My thought for the day comes from some contemplation on Scripture at the Internet Monk on the Christian cliche, God's "still, small voice" from 1 Kings 19:11-13, where the prophet Elijah, after doing some miracles and being chased/persecuted for several days, finds himself at the same mountain where Moses encountered God face-to-face. Depressed, frustrated, and lonely, Elijah complains about his plight to God, whereupon God responds with fabulous displays of power - a mighty wind, a powerful earthquake, and a raging fire, but "the Lord was not in the _______." Then after these, there is a still, small voice.
The common church interpretation/teaching of this passage is usually something along the lines of, we need to tune out the noise of this world to listen to God's still, small voice for direction, comfort, and assurance. However, the article writer does an interesting job of presenting an alternative perspective: rather than revealing a way that God speaks to us, the passage is instead a story about how God will typically not use spectacular displays of power to give us a "mountaintop experience" when we're depressed and down about life circumstances. Instead, it is "a call to simply go back to work, doing what God has called us to do, relying on his promises; trusting that the work is his and not ours to define and achieve."
I appreciated the challenge in the reading to consider context and the bigger story more deeply rather than locking in a particular phrase and adopting it as my own, and this particular call to go back to work that God has called me to do, trusting that the work is his and not mine, is an encouragement in the midst of what has been a difficult year.
Friday, February 19, 2010
Abundance and Generosity
Every year in the midst of the holiday season, there's some store (CostPlus World Mart?) that sells a gigantic tub of delectable white cheddar cheese balls known as "Snowballs." There's more than enough for almost anyone to get sick of.
One year while living at the Kittoe House, we got one, and ended up grazing on it for several weeks on an almost nightly basis. We offered it to every visitor that came by, until we were so sick of it that we felt some relief when we finished it. A few months ago at a friends' party, there was another tub. It was like Jesus and the disciples passing out food at the 5K feeding - it seemed bottomless.
I remember thinking that we were trying to be so generous when offering it to guests - "Here, take some! These are awesome!" - and it was easy and fun to be generous. Why? Because there seemed to be an overabundance of these little balls, which probably didn't actually cost very much to make, and the tub didn't cost that much either. A few dollars and bottomless generosity can be yours!
Why is it so hard for me to have that kind of generosity in other aspects of life? Why can't I take joyful delight in sharing?
Why am I tightfisted with money, with my time for others, with God's love, with the amount of personal interest or social capital I could invest in people's lives?
"Here, take some / try this / come with me! This will be awesome!"
Instead, I avoid people's eyes, try not to volunteer, and grumble under my breath all too often when I end up doing something I don't want to do.
I suspect the reason is that by default, I live with a scarcity, zero sum mentality. Money that I give away is not shared, it's gone and added to someone else. Time is harder to come by as I get older. It's tiring to joyfully take interest in a new person and try to develop them into a new friend.
I'd like to be joyfully generous.
To get there, I think I have some things to learn about living in the tension between my limited human frailties and weaknesses that need to be protected and accounted for with boundaries, and the limitless, overabundant love, mercies, and grace of Jesus that are renewed every morning - but only if I remember.
One year while living at the Kittoe House, we got one, and ended up grazing on it for several weeks on an almost nightly basis. We offered it to every visitor that came by, until we were so sick of it that we felt some relief when we finished it. A few months ago at a friends' party, there was another tub. It was like Jesus and the disciples passing out food at the 5K feeding - it seemed bottomless.
I remember thinking that we were trying to be so generous when offering it to guests - "Here, take some! These are awesome!" - and it was easy and fun to be generous. Why? Because there seemed to be an overabundance of these little balls, which probably didn't actually cost very much to make, and the tub didn't cost that much either. A few dollars and bottomless generosity can be yours!
Why is it so hard for me to have that kind of generosity in other aspects of life? Why can't I take joyful delight in sharing?
Why am I tightfisted with money, with my time for others, with God's love, with the amount of personal interest or social capital I could invest in people's lives?
"Here, take some / try this / come with me! This will be awesome!"
Instead, I avoid people's eyes, try not to volunteer, and grumble under my breath all too often when I end up doing something I don't want to do.
I suspect the reason is that by default, I live with a scarcity, zero sum mentality. Money that I give away is not shared, it's gone and added to someone else. Time is harder to come by as I get older. It's tiring to joyfully take interest in a new person and try to develop them into a new friend.
I'd like to be joyfully generous.
To get there, I think I have some things to learn about living in the tension between my limited human frailties and weaknesses that need to be protected and accounted for with boundaries, and the limitless, overabundant love, mercies, and grace of Jesus that are renewed every morning - but only if I remember.
Sunday, January 17, 2010
2009 Retrospective: Top Books
I was surprised to look at my book log and see that I read 35 books in 2009. Being married to a librarian definitely has its perks, as I can put things on hold and she can pick them up for me at work. In no particular order...
Non-fiction
"Outliers" by Malcolm Gladwell. My favorite of his major releases, as the studies and insights into what goes into success was actually quite interesting, insightful and also somewhat applicable. For example, his theories about the Asian immigrant work ethic (in short - rice paddies can be worked year-round while traditional crop fields need to be left alone to regain nutrients) kicked off other thoughts about whether this would impact Asian spirituality, and Christianity in particular.
"The Emotionally Healthy Church" by Peter Scazzero. With the drama that our English service went through in 2009, with our longtime English pastor resigning and several members leaving for other churches, my spirit was suffering a little bit. It was very timely to be able to read this book from the lead pastor at New Life Fellowship in Queens to be able to understand how to integrate Christian spirituality with the day-to-day and moment-to-moment human emotions and issues I deal with in work, church, family, and at home.
Fiction
Lots of sci-fi and fantasy this year...
"A Song of Ice and Fire" series by George R.R. Martin. I heard about this epic fantasy series from a column by Doc Jensen at the Entertainment Weekly website about "Lost." It took a while to get into, but now I'm hooked into the characters, grim storylines, action, politics/manipulations, and everything else. Even though each book is 1000+ pages, they're hard to put down because the characters are so well fleshed out. Although I think the reputation of Martin as "the American Tolkien" isn't quite accurate, this series was still my favorite find of the year. Waiting for the 4th book to come from the library now.
"Ender's Shadow" by Orson Scott Card. I also re-read Ender's Game this year, and then the companion book about Ender's subordinate but intellectual equal, Bean. I couldn't quite get into the post-Battle School books like "Speaker for the Dead," however.
"Old Man's War" series by John Scalzi. Very neat sci-fi universe where human consciousness can be transferred into a genetically engineered body created with your own DNA, so human armies are composed of old people about to die who enlist and then are given a new lease on life in prime physical health.
"Watchmen" by Alan Moore and Dave Gibbons. Better than the movie, although I wasn't fond of the whole pirate sub-story.
"Allegiance," "Outbound Flight," and "Survivor's Quest" by Timothy Zahn. I read through the most recent three books written by my favorite Star Wars author, and while they weren't as memorable as some earlier work, he never disappoints.
Re-read:
"The Lord of the Rings" by J.R.R. Tolkien. How could I not re-read the classics after visiting Middle-Earth?
"Starship Troopers" by Robert Heinlein. Since it's been so long since I read this, my most recent memory of the story came from the so-bad-it's-awesome movie. Re-reading the book reminded me that it is nothing like the movie.
Non-fiction
"Outliers" by Malcolm Gladwell. My favorite of his major releases, as the studies and insights into what goes into success was actually quite interesting, insightful and also somewhat applicable. For example, his theories about the Asian immigrant work ethic (in short - rice paddies can be worked year-round while traditional crop fields need to be left alone to regain nutrients) kicked off other thoughts about whether this would impact Asian spirituality, and Christianity in particular.
"The Emotionally Healthy Church" by Peter Scazzero. With the drama that our English service went through in 2009, with our longtime English pastor resigning and several members leaving for other churches, my spirit was suffering a little bit. It was very timely to be able to read this book from the lead pastor at New Life Fellowship in Queens to be able to understand how to integrate Christian spirituality with the day-to-day and moment-to-moment human emotions and issues I deal with in work, church, family, and at home.
Fiction
Lots of sci-fi and fantasy this year...
"A Song of Ice and Fire" series by George R.R. Martin. I heard about this epic fantasy series from a column by Doc Jensen at the Entertainment Weekly website about "Lost." It took a while to get into, but now I'm hooked into the characters, grim storylines, action, politics/manipulations, and everything else. Even though each book is 1000+ pages, they're hard to put down because the characters are so well fleshed out. Although I think the reputation of Martin as "the American Tolkien" isn't quite accurate, this series was still my favorite find of the year. Waiting for the 4th book to come from the library now.
"Ender's Shadow" by Orson Scott Card. I also re-read Ender's Game this year, and then the companion book about Ender's subordinate but intellectual equal, Bean. I couldn't quite get into the post-Battle School books like "Speaker for the Dead," however.
"Old Man's War" series by John Scalzi. Very neat sci-fi universe where human consciousness can be transferred into a genetically engineered body created with your own DNA, so human armies are composed of old people about to die who enlist and then are given a new lease on life in prime physical health.
"Watchmen" by Alan Moore and Dave Gibbons. Better than the movie, although I wasn't fond of the whole pirate sub-story.
"Allegiance," "Outbound Flight," and "Survivor's Quest" by Timothy Zahn. I read through the most recent three books written by my favorite Star Wars author, and while they weren't as memorable as some earlier work, he never disappoints.
Re-read:
"The Lord of the Rings" by J.R.R. Tolkien. How could I not re-read the classics after visiting Middle-Earth?
"Starship Troopers" by Robert Heinlein. Since it's been so long since I read this, my most recent memory of the story came from the so-bad-it's-awesome movie. Re-reading the book reminded me that it is nothing like the movie.
Friday, October 16, 2009
Death and resurrection
I'm not somebody that likes big changes.
I've been in the Bay Area for two-thirds of my life. I have yet to voluntarily change jobs (got laid off once). I only had one girlfriend, who is now my wife. Even traveling tends to stress me out at the beginning due to the preparation required and the tying up of loose ends needed.
Lately, God has been impressing upon me this principle: Something has to die before it can be resurrected.
Put another way by a friend: God doesn't pour new wine into old wineskins (Matthew 9:17).
Meditating on these verses lately:
John 12:24 - I tell you the truth, unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains only a single seed. But if it dies, it produces many seeds.
Luke 13:6-9 - Then he told this parable: "A man had a fig tree, planted in his vineyard, and he went to look for fruit on it, but did not find any. So he said to the man who took care of the vineyard, 'For three years now I've been coming to look for fruit on this fig tree and haven't found any. Cut it down! Why should it use up the soil?'
" 'Sir,' the man replied, 'leave it alone for one more year, and I'll dig around it and fertilize it. If it bears fruit next year, fine! If not, then cut it down.' "
Tomorrow, Shally and I will be on our way to the land down under, the largest natural structure that can be seen from space, and Middle-Earth (aka Sydney, the Great Barrier Reef, and the South Island of New Zealand) for three weeks - by my memory, the second longest time I'll have been away from home.
We'll be spending one of the weeks surrounded by scenery like this:
I'm hoping for a good time of rest, reflection, and renewal. When we get back, there are likely more changes in store in our lives, more dying that needs to be done, perhaps some working of the soil, before life can come again.
Will write again upon our return.
I've been in the Bay Area for two-thirds of my life. I have yet to voluntarily change jobs (got laid off once). I only had one girlfriend, who is now my wife. Even traveling tends to stress me out at the beginning due to the preparation required and the tying up of loose ends needed.
Lately, God has been impressing upon me this principle: Something has to die before it can be resurrected.
Put another way by a friend: God doesn't pour new wine into old wineskins (Matthew 9:17).
Meditating on these verses lately:
John 12:24 - I tell you the truth, unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains only a single seed. But if it dies, it produces many seeds.
Luke 13:6-9 - Then he told this parable: "A man had a fig tree, planted in his vineyard, and he went to look for fruit on it, but did not find any. So he said to the man who took care of the vineyard, 'For three years now I've been coming to look for fruit on this fig tree and haven't found any. Cut it down! Why should it use up the soil?'
" 'Sir,' the man replied, 'leave it alone for one more year, and I'll dig around it and fertilize it. If it bears fruit next year, fine! If not, then cut it down.' "
Tomorrow, Shally and I will be on our way to the land down under, the largest natural structure that can be seen from space, and Middle-Earth (aka Sydney, the Great Barrier Reef, and the South Island of New Zealand) for three weeks - by my memory, the second longest time I'll have been away from home.
We'll be spending one of the weeks surrounded by scenery like this:
I'm hoping for a good time of rest, reflection, and renewal. When we get back, there are likely more changes in store in our lives, more dying that needs to be done, perhaps some working of the soil, before life can come again.
Will write again upon our return.
Thursday, August 20, 2009
With All The Saints
I had the privilege of giving the sermon at my church 3 weeks ago, on July 26. The mp3 is now up and I published my accompanying slides for anyone interested in listening. I appreciate any feedback or criticism:
Here's a reader's digest version of the message, "With All The Saints", based on Ephesians 3:17-21:
Wouldn't the world be a better place if everyone was just like me? Thought, believed, did things like me?
If only my husband or wife would have my point of view, we wouldn't be having this fight.
If only my coworkers knew how important it is to do things my way, we'd be so much more productive.
If only everyone believed in Jesus as their Savior like I do, then we wouldn't have to evangelize.
If only the church leaders would do what I think, we'd be a better church.
Ephesians 3 sheds some light on God's intent for dealing with messy people. As a multicultural church, they had disagreements, fights, and difficulties reconciling where they came from with their new identity in Christ, and how to be the church with other believers who were otherwise nothing like them.
17-21 And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.
Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.
God's goal/purpose: glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations
Our (humanity's) goal/purpose: filled to the measure of all the fullness of God, made like him
Our method: know and grasp all the dimensions of the love of Christ, which surpasses knowledge
How do we do that? Together with some of the saints you like. Together with the saints who look like you do, think the way that you do, work as hard as you do, live as morally as you do. No, it says, Together with ALL the saints. All the messy, disagreeable, stubborn, arrogant, unrepentant, first gen, second gen, saints who are still being changed by God from the inside out, some with more of a way to go than others.
We experience the fullness of God's love and glory when we are 1, not 1s.
We need to apply the gospel to ourselves (the depth and height of God's love):
Keller: “The Christian gospel is that I am so flawed that Jesus had to die for me, yet I am so loved and valued that Jesus was glad to die for me. This leads to deep humility and deep confidence at the same time. It undermines both swaggering and sniveling. I cannot feel superior to anyone, and yet I have nothing to prove to anyone. I do not think more of myself nor less of myself. Instead, I think of myself less.”
We need to apply the gospel to each other (the width and length of God's love):
width = available to all ppl, including those we don't like or want to give grace to - "Reach out to each other. Bear each other's burdens," (Gal 6:2)
length = this was God's plan all along, part of the good works he prepared in advance for us to do (Eph 2:10)
When we do this, the church becomes a hospital for the sick rather than a museum of saints, restoring broken, messy, flawed people to wholeness in Christ - and being part of that process enables us to experience the fullness of God's love and glory.
Here's a reader's digest version of the message, "With All The Saints", based on Ephesians 3:17-21:
Wouldn't the world be a better place if everyone was just like me? Thought, believed, did things like me?
If only my husband or wife would have my point of view, we wouldn't be having this fight.
If only my coworkers knew how important it is to do things my way, we'd be so much more productive.
If only everyone believed in Jesus as their Savior like I do, then we wouldn't have to evangelize.
If only the church leaders would do what I think, we'd be a better church.
Ephesians 3 sheds some light on God's intent for dealing with messy people. As a multicultural church, they had disagreements, fights, and difficulties reconciling where they came from with their new identity in Christ, and how to be the church with other believers who were otherwise nothing like them.
17-21 And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.
Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.
God's goal/purpose: glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations
Our (humanity's) goal/purpose: filled to the measure of all the fullness of God, made like him
Our method: know and grasp all the dimensions of the love of Christ, which surpasses knowledge
How do we do that? Together with some of the saints you like. Together with the saints who look like you do, think the way that you do, work as hard as you do, live as morally as you do. No, it says, Together with ALL the saints. All the messy, disagreeable, stubborn, arrogant, unrepentant, first gen, second gen, saints who are still being changed by God from the inside out, some with more of a way to go than others.
We experience the fullness of God's love and glory when we are 1, not 1s.
We need to apply the gospel to ourselves (the depth and height of God's love):
Keller: “The Christian gospel is that I am so flawed that Jesus had to die for me, yet I am so loved and valued that Jesus was glad to die for me. This leads to deep humility and deep confidence at the same time. It undermines both swaggering and sniveling. I cannot feel superior to anyone, and yet I have nothing to prove to anyone. I do not think more of myself nor less of myself. Instead, I think of myself less.”
We need to apply the gospel to each other (the width and length of God's love):
width = available to all ppl, including those we don't like or want to give grace to - "Reach out to each other. Bear each other's burdens," (Gal 6:2)
length = this was God's plan all along, part of the good works he prepared in advance for us to do (Eph 2:10)
When we do this, the church becomes a hospital for the sick rather than a museum of saints, restoring broken, messy, flawed people to wholeness in Christ - and being part of that process enables us to experience the fullness of God's love and glory.
Saturday, April 11, 2009
The Long Saturday
Simon. Thomas. James. Andrew. Philip. Matthew. Bartholomew. Simon the Zealot. John. James son of Alphaeus. Thaddaeus.
Not yet household names, almost 2000 years ago, these men had just seen their lives go up in smoke. Their mentor, and for some, best friend, had been brutally and publicly tortured and killed the previous evening. With him had gone the dreams of freeing their people from Roman oppression, even as much as he had tried to dissuade them from those ideas.
No jobs to return to - they had quit them three years before. Wives, families, communities had all been deserted to follow a slightly kooky homeless man all around the countryside. If they returned, they would undoubtedly be the laughingstock of their towns at best, and at worst, arrested for sedition.
In the midst of an entire day and two of the longest nights of their lives, through a haze of dull despair and shattered hopes, they had to ask... what now?
It is always the darkest before the dawn.
Not yet household names, almost 2000 years ago, these men had just seen their lives go up in smoke. Their mentor, and for some, best friend, had been brutally and publicly tortured and killed the previous evening. With him had gone the dreams of freeing their people from Roman oppression, even as much as he had tried to dissuade them from those ideas.
No jobs to return to - they had quit them three years before. Wives, families, communities had all been deserted to follow a slightly kooky homeless man all around the countryside. If they returned, they would undoubtedly be the laughingstock of their towns at best, and at worst, arrested for sedition.
In the midst of an entire day and two of the longest nights of their lives, through a haze of dull despair and shattered hopes, they had to ask... what now?
It is always the darkest before the dawn.
Tuesday, August 12, 2008
"Peace"
One of the reasons why these Olympics in particular are so fascinating is because of the diplomatic tensions that exist when two nation-states meet in sports competition (often used as an analogy for war) while their respective governments and armies may in fact be engaged in actual war. How can athletes from the former Soviet republic of Georgia compete against opponents from Russia while knowing of the invasion? What is going on in the minds of Israelis, Palestinians, Iraqis, Iranians, and Americans when they stare each other down across a swimming pool, ball field, or track? Will any big names come out in the press against the nations that are not doing anything about the genocide in Darfur?
A quote from the above article:
The former declares that peace exists as long as no shots are being fired. The absence of conflict. We smile awkwardly at each other, dampening down anxiety repeatedly while little glimpses of the resentment and uneasiness simmering underneath will peek through during times of stress. This happens in sports, it happens in workplaces, in marriages, in churches.
God desires peace to be so much more than the absence of conflict, but rather the presence of justice, wholeness, and acceptance. "Blessed are the peacemakers" - peace is something that needs to be worked at, not just achieved by having no conflict.
As a person who is non-confrontational by nature, it's often easy for me to settle for the first kind of peace - as long as there's no conflict, between Shally and myself, in church, in leadership, at work, at home, then things are "cool." However, I've been learning that it's not enough to just avoid confrontation - I need to actively work for wholeness, with heavy doses of grace, in order to bring all of my relationships into the kind of peace God has his heart set on for his people.
A quote from the above article:
The Beijing Olympics have morphed into the anxiety games. Beneath the veneer of architectural miracles and omnipresent smiles and the "one world, one dream" slogan, there is unease, exacerbated by a secretive Communist regime that rations information. No info, no closure. There are 100,000 Chinese security troops patrolling Beijing, all standing as still as scarecrows, many with the young, porcelain faces of toy soldiers. They are stationed on every street corner, ubiquitous under newly planted trees that line the sidewalks. They are numerically impressive but not especially comforting.I think this further illustrates the difference between what the world defines as peace, and what the God of the Bible defines as peace.
The former declares that peace exists as long as no shots are being fired. The absence of conflict. We smile awkwardly at each other, dampening down anxiety repeatedly while little glimpses of the resentment and uneasiness simmering underneath will peek through during times of stress. This happens in sports, it happens in workplaces, in marriages, in churches.
God desires peace to be so much more than the absence of conflict, but rather the presence of justice, wholeness, and acceptance. "Blessed are the peacemakers" - peace is something that needs to be worked at, not just achieved by having no conflict.
As a person who is non-confrontational by nature, it's often easy for me to settle for the first kind of peace - as long as there's no conflict, between Shally and myself, in church, in leadership, at work, at home, then things are "cool." However, I've been learning that it's not enough to just avoid confrontation - I need to actively work for wholeness, with heavy doses of grace, in order to bring all of my relationships into the kind of peace God has his heart set on for his people.
Sunday, August 03, 2008
On hope management
I read an article on leadership a while ago on Christianity Today where the writer, John Ortberg from Menlo Park Pres, makes the argument that while leaders need to do many things involving their followers in the process of leading - identifying gifts, putting people into positions to succeed, delegating their weaknesses - it is necessary that the leader never delegate optimism and hope. Leaders need to be experts in "Hope Management."
He writes this about former President Franklin Roosevelt, who was apparently a man with a "second-rate intelligence but had a first-rate temperament":
This hits me deeply because I have been, through choice or necessity, been trying to take on greater leadership roles in several areas of my life. The challenge for me is that I've evolved to a point where I am generally optimistic and encouraging with other people, but generally negative and pessimistic about myself. In other words, I think or act like others are awesome ("You/we can do it!") perhaps more than is warranted, in the hope that they can exceed their capability; yet I will consciously or unconsciously degrade myself ("Bob, you failed before, and you're going to fail again, why not give up?").
I'm finding now how important it is to have, and to be, leaders who are not just competent, trustworthy, and possessing integrity, but if there is no hope, no belief that a goal can be accomplished, then every follower's spirit will be broken. I've seen this positively and negatively reinforced in my workplace, in church, and in my relationship - as a follower in some cases and as a leader in others. Even though it is sometimes exhausting to try and cling to an existing hope, or generate a new hope, I'm hoping that God will be able to supersede my natural cynicism to believe in spite of myself.
He writes this about former President Franklin Roosevelt, who was apparently a man with a "second-rate intelligence but had a first-rate temperament":
In the middle of a Great Depression, or World War II, or a capital campaign, or a staff crisis, people inevitably wonder: "Can we get through this? Is it worth all the effort and confusion? Can we really overcome this challenge?" They inevitably look to the person at the core; the man or woman leading the charge, the one who sees the big picture. When people see a leader with this kind of vital optimism, who radiates a sense that together we can do what needs to be done, then people tend to decide not to waste their energy wondering about "if" but focus their energy going after "how."He then mentions how his journals as a leader tend to be full of chronicles of failure - not confessions of shortcomings, but vague discouragements that don't allow him to feel forgiveness or grace from God and in fact would cause him to spiral deeper into discouragement. As he put it, instead of "encouraging himself in the Lord" like King David writes about in the Scriptures, he was "discouraging himself in the Lord."
On the other hand, when Eeyore is at the helm, the whole ship is in trouble. Eeyore may be the most intelligent, gifted, attractive, educated, credentialed person in the room. But if he or she is easily deflated, sensitive to defeat and criticism, and de-motivated by setbacks, the whole community begins the long slow spiral downward.
This hits me deeply because I have been, through choice or necessity, been trying to take on greater leadership roles in several areas of my life. The challenge for me is that I've evolved to a point where I am generally optimistic and encouraging with other people, but generally negative and pessimistic about myself. In other words, I think or act like others are awesome ("You/we can do it!") perhaps more than is warranted, in the hope that they can exceed their capability; yet I will consciously or unconsciously degrade myself ("Bob, you failed before, and you're going to fail again, why not give up?").
I'm finding now how important it is to have, and to be, leaders who are not just competent, trustworthy, and possessing integrity, but if there is no hope, no belief that a goal can be accomplished, then every follower's spirit will be broken. I've seen this positively and negatively reinforced in my workplace, in church, and in my relationship - as a follower in some cases and as a leader in others. Even though it is sometimes exhausting to try and cling to an existing hope, or generate a new hope, I'm hoping that God will be able to supersede my natural cynicism to believe in spite of myself.
Saturday, April 05, 2008
Notes on Tim Keller's lecture "Belief in an Age of Skepticism"
About a month ago, I attended a Veritas lecture at Stanford by Rev. Tim Keller from Redeemer Presbyterian Church in NYC about "The Reason for God." In short, I found it to be a good synopsis of some common apologetics arguments phrased in a much more eloquent and educated way than I could ever come up with. The lecture and subsequent Q&A session can be found online at Google Video, but since I remember best when I take notes, I took the liberty of outlining the lecture below along with video references. You can check out the notes and pick and choose sections of each video to watch if you don't have time to see the whole thing.
Feel free to comment if there are any ideas that you want to discuss...
Tim Keller - "Belief in an Age of Skepticism" - Lecture 2008-03-05
Reasons for God
I) Why important?
II) How does it work?
III) What are those reasons?
I) Why important? (1:40-8:10)
Important for skeptic because:
- Robust orthodox belief in God is not diminishing but is in fact believing, despite the belief that as society became more sophisticated/advanced, less interest in God (secularization thesis)
-- in Asia/Africa, Christianity/Islam expanding like crazy - ex. Korea 1-40%, China more Christians than in US, 2 million US Episcopalians, 17 million in Nigeria
- in pluralistic society, in order to get around, must put ourselves into each others' shoes and understand why we/they believe
- new atheism (Dawkins) - respect for religion is bad
Important for believer because:
- if you admit and deal with doubts, your foundation is strengthened when troubles come
II) How does it work? (8:10-15:20)
Three reasons:
1) intellectual - see part 3
2) interpreted personal experience
ex. tragedies
- interpretation 1 - "I can't handle life alone, I need God"
- interpretation 2 - "I don't want a God who lets this happen"
ex. made it to the top
- interpretation 1 - "Who needs God?"
- interpretation 2 - "I've made it to the top and I still feel empty"
3) social
- sociology of knowledge - your community (ppl you need and admire) determines what you want to believe
- "If you were born in Madagascar, you wouldn't be a Christian!" = I have thought things out, you are a product of your environment.
-- response: "If *you* were born in Madagascar, you wouldn't be a secular pluralist."
Not fair to say "I'm rational and you're socially conditioned."
III) What are those reasons?
Three Rungs on a Ladder
1) takes as much faith to disbelieve in God as to believe in God
2) it takes *more* faith to disbelieve in God as to believe in God
3) you can reason to the point of probability, it takes personal involvement/commitment to see life change
Rung #1 (15:20-36:50)
Arguments for non-existence of God
1) "senseless and pointless" evil and suffering
- good God not powerful enough to stop it
- God powerful enough to stop it but chooses not to
- therefore, no all-powerful and all-good God
Doesn't work because: how do you know it's pointless and senseless? How do you know God doesn't have a good reason for it that you can't think of?
Example: "Look in this pup tent, are there any St. Bernards?" Can be seen. "Are there any parameciums?" Can't tell.
2) believers in God are so horrible
- human heart can take any philosophy or view of God and use it as a warrant for violence ("I have the truth and you don't so you're a second class citizen")
-- ex. Buddhism -> Shintoism -> Japan in WWII
-- ex. Christianity -> Crusades, shooting abortion doctors
-- ex. Islam -> terrorism
-- ex. atheism -> Communism -> Russian killing fields (If I can get away with a bad act, I can get away with it, no judgment day)
3) agnostic approach
- 5 blind men who come up on elephant and describe it diff ways, so no one has full picture of God - we are all blind men!
-- analogy breaks down b/c it assumes the storyteller can know that all the blind men are blind, and can see the whole elephant - having superior knowledge
-- appearance of humility, but it is an arrogant claim to exclusive truth
- instead, say "maybe one of these folks is right"
4) "you have to prove God to me"
- this is a leap of faith that God is something that you can prove
- makes sense for a Creator God not to fit into the universe
- ex. there is no non-circular way to prove that your memory works, can't prove a belief in the inherent human dignity
- ex. when Soviets sent first cosmonaut to space, felt that meant no God. CS Lewis' response: can't relate to God like a person on 1st story to person on 3rd story, rather like Hamlet to Shakespeare (creation to creator) - Hamlet can't figure anything out about Shakespeare by running around backstage, but only if Shakespeare writes something about himself into the play
Rung #2 (36:50-51:25)
Argument: The things we see and know in the world make more sense if there is a God than if there is not
3 things that make more sense w/ God
1) "fine tuning principle" / anthropic principle
- very specific natural "dials" in order for human life to occur - 1/1 trillion chance that world could support life
- Dawkins' argument - multitude of alternate universes, ours is just chance
-- counterargument - dealing 20 straight aces, we don't believe that it's chance
- would anyone base their life on a 1/trillion chance?
2) love and beauty
- alternate explanation: generated by chemicals in brain solely for purpose of furthering your genetic code
- feels significant, but it's not - in the end, whether you're loving or cruel, makes no difference
3) human rights
- can't prove it, not self-evident - why?
a) there is God and God created us in his image, so we're sacred
b) nature
- doesn't work. Ex. woman who lived by creek - evolution loves death more than you or me, we value individual supremely, but nature values life not at all. Can't be produced from a sea of amino acids and then turn and shake fist at it
- nature = survival of strongest, which is opposite of human rights
c) society creates/defines human rights
- wrong b/c then that means genocide is only wrong b/c we say so, and majority can exploit minority, which is not human rights
Rung #3 (51:25-56:36)
Analogy: falling off a cliff, see a branch
If I grab it, it may hold me up, it may not, you may be certain, but you don't know until you grab it
Weak faith in a strong object is infinitely more important than strong faith in a weak object b/c it is the object of faith that is more important
Analogy: hiring
Can only do so much background check, etc. but need to hire to know if you are the right person
Christianity is only religion where God becomes a person - why important?
Analogy: Dorothy Sayers' detective books - she wrote herself into the book and rescues the characters b/c she loves them so much
God saw his creation, fell in love with us, and wrote Himself into the play to rescue us
Tim Keller - "Belief in an Age of Skepticism" - Q&A 2008-03-05
1) 0:00-4:00 - Dawkins' "rotating teacup around Earth" argument - can't prove it, can't prove God = "Verification Principle"
A: You can't empirically prove the Verification Principle. Science only works on empirical objects, but you can't base your life on empiricism.
2) 4:40-6:40 Joseph Campbell quote that God transcends existence and so we can't know him
A: Right in honoring the size/scope of God, wrong in saying that God can't be described/fit into categories of what we know
3) 6:40-11:30 Francis Collins talk about evolution and Christianity co-existing
A: Christians are on all different sides of the spectrum, but to determine Christianity, the question really is - did Jesus rise from the dead? Diff viewpoints include theistic evolution, progressive creationism, etc. Try reading The Secular Revolution by Christian Smith about the secularization of higher institutions.
4) 11:30-18:40 How is Christianity different from Judaism, Islam, and other religions?
A: Every other religion has a prophet that says "I am here to help you find God." Only Christianity has a founder who says, "I am God come to find you." Christ makes unbelievable claims - ex. "I saw Satan fall from heaven," "For years I have been sending you prophets and wise men and you killed them all," "Before Abraham existed, I am". Christianity will either be better or worse (fraudulent) than other religions, but cannot be the same.
So, check out whether Christianity is true:
- are Gospels basically reliable? Check out Jesus and the Eyewitnesses - Gospels not oral traditions but oral histories from eyewitnesses (who remain in Gospel to authenticate Gospel)
- did Jesus rise from the dead? Check out The Resurrection of the Son of God - NT Wright - ex. 1st ppl to see risen Christ are women, who were of such low status that their testimony is not admissible evidence in court - so it wouldn't make sense to write them into the document, unless it's true.
5) 18:40-24:30 What does it mean for you to be Christian?
A: Original way in college - intellectually wrestling with evil, suffering, etc.; personally saw weaknesses in experiences in college; socially saw Christians who didn't care about justice and non-Christians who did. Finally met Christians who did believe in justice. 2002 had thyroid cancer, am I going to die? While recuperating, read Resurrection of the Son of God, read everything while confronting death, took me down to a new level of certainty intellectually (while already immersed personally). If the resurrection is true, then the universe is an ocean of beauty and glory, and we're locked temporarily into a window of darkness and evil.
6) 24:30-30:40 What does belief and faith mean?
A: When I'm falling off a cliff and I see a branch that can save me, I may reason that it is strong enough to save me, but I need to grab it - I need to act on my reason - for it to be effective. In personal relationship with God, He may tell you things that you don't like to hear. If God is truly not of this world, then His Word will offend every culture on earth.
7) 30:40-35:00 Why value philosophical level of reasoning about evil instead of the "real" level of suffering we personally experience?
A: The struggle may be personal and people hide it behind the intellectual/philosophical. Goal is to strip away the philosophical level in order to cleanly deal with the personal level. Christian faith is only one where God says he loves us enough to subject himself to suffering, and can identify with us in suffering - losing a son, being betrayed by friends, etc. Now, I don't know why evil and suffering are there, but I know what it isn't - it isn't b/c He doesn't love us or doesn't care.
8) 35:00-39:10 Christianity is based on racial/cultural background - could there be a better one less hindered by it?
A: Christianity is on its way to becoming culture-neutral. Hindus primarily Indian. Buddhism primarily Asian. Muslims primarily Middle Eastern. Christian demographic center has migrated from Jewish to Greek to Eastern Europe (Armenia) to Western Europe to North America to China. With each migration, each culture influences/transforms the religion (ex. Greek philosophy of Trinity). Average evangelical Christian is now non-white. Now, Asian culture will be transformed by Christianity and will change Christian theology.
9) 39:10-45:15 How can you condemn other religions coming from other cultures and backgrounds to hell?
A: I don't condemn other people, I ask, "What do you do with the fact that Jesus claimed to be Son of God?" He's either the Way, or not. Christians don't know what happens to infants who die, and it's not my business. Christians don't believe you go to heaven b/c you're good, but b/c you know you need God's mercy and you admit your moral failure. The ethics between Christianity and other religions is similar, but the way we connect to God is different. We say the only way to heaven I know about is what I've been told - that I can't. Americans get the most bent out of shape about this b/c of Western Enlightenment thought, democracy, everyone gets a vote - rest of world has no problem with "one true religion" idea. Everyone in hell is there b/c they want to be - they want to be their own savior and lord, and they don't want to be in heaven with God pushing them around. People go to hell b/c they want to be, people go to heaven b/c Jesus is there and they want to be with him.
Feel free to comment if there are any ideas that you want to discuss...
Tim Keller - "Belief in an Age of Skepticism" - Lecture 2008-03-05
Reasons for God
I) Why important?
II) How does it work?
III) What are those reasons?
I) Why important? (1:40-8:10)
Important for skeptic because:
- Robust orthodox belief in God is not diminishing but is in fact believing, despite the belief that as society became more sophisticated/advanced, less interest in God (secularization thesis)
-- in Asia/Africa, Christianity/Islam expanding like crazy - ex. Korea 1-40%, China more Christians than in US, 2 million US Episcopalians, 17 million in Nigeria
- in pluralistic society, in order to get around, must put ourselves into each others' shoes and understand why we/they believe
- new atheism (Dawkins) - respect for religion is bad
Important for believer because:
- if you admit and deal with doubts, your foundation is strengthened when troubles come
II) How does it work? (8:10-15:20)
Three reasons:
1) intellectual - see part 3
2) interpreted personal experience
ex. tragedies
- interpretation 1 - "I can't handle life alone, I need God"
- interpretation 2 - "I don't want a God who lets this happen"
ex. made it to the top
- interpretation 1 - "Who needs God?"
- interpretation 2 - "I've made it to the top and I still feel empty"
3) social
- sociology of knowledge - your community (ppl you need and admire) determines what you want to believe
- "If you were born in Madagascar, you wouldn't be a Christian!" = I have thought things out, you are a product of your environment.
-- response: "If *you* were born in Madagascar, you wouldn't be a secular pluralist."
Not fair to say "I'm rational and you're socially conditioned."
III) What are those reasons?
Three Rungs on a Ladder
1) takes as much faith to disbelieve in God as to believe in God
2) it takes *more* faith to disbelieve in God as to believe in God
3) you can reason to the point of probability, it takes personal involvement/commitment to see life change
Rung #1 (15:20-36:50)
Arguments for non-existence of God
1) "senseless and pointless" evil and suffering
- good God not powerful enough to stop it
- God powerful enough to stop it but chooses not to
- therefore, no all-powerful and all-good God
Doesn't work because: how do you know it's pointless and senseless? How do you know God doesn't have a good reason for it that you can't think of?
Example: "Look in this pup tent, are there any St. Bernards?" Can be seen. "Are there any parameciums
2) believers in God are so horrible
- human heart can take any philosophy or view of God and use it as a warrant for violence ("I have the truth and you don't so you're a second class citizen")
-- ex. Buddhism -> Shintoism -> Japan in WWII
-- ex. Christianity -> Crusades, shooting abortion doctors
-- ex. Islam -> terrorism
-- ex. atheism -> Communism -> Russian killing fields (If I can get away with a bad act, I can get away with it, no judgment day)
3) agnostic approach
- 5 blind men who come up on elephant and describe it diff ways, so no one has full picture of God - we are all blind men!
-- analogy breaks down b/c it assumes the storyteller can know that all the blind men are blind, and can see the whole elephant - having superior knowledge
-- appearance of humility, but it is an arrogant claim to exclusive truth
- instead, say "maybe one of these folks is right"
4) "you have to prove God to me"
- this is a leap of faith that God is something that you can prove
- makes sense for a Creator God not to fit into the universe
- ex. there is no non-circular way to prove that your memory works, can't prove a belief in the inherent human dignity
- ex. when Soviets sent first cosmonaut to space, felt that meant no God. CS Lewis' response: can't relate to God like a person on 1st story to person on 3rd story, rather like Hamlet to Shakespeare (creation to creator) - Hamlet can't figure anything out about Shakespeare by running around backstage, but only if Shakespeare writes something about himself into the play
Rung #2 (36:50-51:25)
Argument: The things we see and know in the world make more sense if there is a God than if there is not
3 things that make more sense w/ God
1) "fine tuning principle" / anthropic principle
- very specific natural "dials" in order for human life to occur - 1/1 trillion chance that world could support life
- Dawkins' argument - multitude of alternate universes, ours is just chance
-- counterargument - dealing 20 straight aces, we don't believe that it's chance
- would anyone base their life on a 1/trillion chance?
2) love and beauty
- alternate explanation: generated by chemicals in brain solely for purpose of furthering your genetic code
- feels significant, but it's not - in the end, whether you're loving or cruel, makes no difference
3) human rights
- can't prove it, not self-evident - why?
a) there is God and God created us in his image, so we're sacred
b) nature
- doesn't work. Ex. woman who lived by creek - evolution loves death more than you or me, we value individual supremely, but nature values life not at all. Can't be produced from a sea of amino acids and then turn and shake fist at it
- nature = survival of strongest, which is opposite of human rights
c) society creates/defines human rights
- wrong b/c then that means genocide is only wrong b/c we say so, and majority can exploit minority, which is not human rights
Rung #3 (51:25-56:36)
Analogy: falling off a cliff, see a branch
If I grab it, it may hold me up, it may not, you may be certain, but you don't know until you grab it
Weak faith in a strong object is infinitely more important than strong faith in a weak object b/c it is the object of faith that is more important
Analogy: hiring
Can only do so much background check, etc. but need to hire to know if you are the right person
Christianity is only religion where God becomes a person - why important?
Analogy: Dorothy Sayers' detective books - she wrote herself into the book and rescues the characters b/c she loves them so much
God saw his creation, fell in love with us, and wrote Himself into the play to rescue us
Tim Keller - "Belief in an Age of Skepticism" - Q&A 2008-03-05
1) 0:00-4:00 - Dawkins' "rotating teacup around Earth" argument - can't prove it, can't prove God = "Verification Principle"
A: You can't empirically prove the Verification Principle. Science only works on empirical objects, but you can't base your life on empiricism.
2) 4:40-6:40 Joseph Campbell quote that God transcends existence and so we can't know him
A: Right in honoring the size/scope of God, wrong in saying that God can't be described/fit into categories of what we know
3) 6:40-11:30 Francis Collins talk about evolution and Christianity co-existing
A: Christians are on all different sides of the spectrum, but to determine Christianity, the question really is - did Jesus rise from the dead? Diff viewpoints include theistic evolution, progressive creationism, etc. Try reading The Secular Revolution by Christian Smith about the secularization of higher institutions.
4) 11:30-18:40 How is Christianity different from Judaism, Islam, and other religions?
A: Every other religion has a prophet that says "I am here to help you find God." Only Christianity has a founder who says, "I am God come to find you." Christ makes unbelievable claims - ex. "I saw Satan fall from heaven," "For years I have been sending you prophets and wise men and you killed them all," "Before Abraham existed, I am". Christianity will either be better or worse (fraudulent) than other religions, but cannot be the same.
So, check out whether Christianity is true:
- are Gospels basically reliable? Check out Jesus and the Eyewitnesses - Gospels not oral traditions but oral histories from eyewitnesses (who remain in Gospel to authenticate Gospel)
- did Jesus rise from the dead? Check out The Resurrection of the Son of God - NT Wright - ex. 1st ppl to see risen Christ are women, who were of such low status that their testimony is not admissible evidence in court - so it wouldn't make sense to write them into the document, unless it's true.
5) 18:40-24:30 What does it mean for you to be Christian?
A: Original way in college - intellectually wrestling with evil, suffering, etc.; personally saw weaknesses in experiences in college; socially saw Christians who didn't care about justice and non-Christians who did. Finally met Christians who did believe in justice. 2002 had thyroid cancer, am I going to die? While recuperating, read Resurrection of the Son of God, read everything while confronting death, took me down to a new level of certainty intellectually (while already immersed personally). If the resurrection is true, then the universe is an ocean of beauty and glory, and we're locked temporarily into a window of darkness and evil.
6) 24:30-30:40 What does belief and faith mean?
A: When I'm falling off a cliff and I see a branch that can save me, I may reason that it is strong enough to save me, but I need to grab it - I need to act on my reason - for it to be effective. In personal relationship with God, He may tell you things that you don't like to hear. If God is truly not of this world, then His Word will offend every culture on earth.
7) 30:40-35:00 Why value philosophical level of reasoning about evil instead of the "real" level of suffering we personally experience?
A: The struggle may be personal and people hide it behind the intellectual/philosophical. Goal is to strip away the philosophical level in order to cleanly deal with the personal level. Christian faith is only one where God says he loves us enough to subject himself to suffering, and can identify with us in suffering - losing a son, being betrayed by friends, etc. Now, I don't know why evil and suffering are there, but I know what it isn't - it isn't b/c He doesn't love us or doesn't care.
8) 35:00-39:10 Christianity is based on racial/cultural background - could there be a better one less hindered by it?
A: Christianity is on its way to becoming culture-neutral. Hindus primarily Indian. Buddhism primarily Asian. Muslims primarily Middle Eastern. Christian demographic center has migrated from Jewish to Greek to Eastern Europe (Armenia) to Western Europe to North America to China. With each migration, each culture influences/transforms the religion (ex. Greek philosophy of Trinity). Average evangelical Christian is now non-white. Now, Asian culture will be transformed by Christianity and will change Christian theology.
9) 39:10-45:15 How can you condemn other religions coming from other cultures and backgrounds to hell?
A: I don't condemn other people, I ask, "What do you do with the fact that Jesus claimed to be Son of God?" He's either the Way, or not. Christians don't know what happens to infants who die, and it's not my business. Christians don't believe you go to heaven b/c you're good, but b/c you know you need God's mercy and you admit your moral failure. The ethics between Christianity and other religions is similar, but the way we connect to God is different. We say the only way to heaven I know about is what I've been told - that I can't. Americans get the most bent out of shape about this b/c of Western Enlightenment thought, democracy, everyone gets a vote - rest of world has no problem with "one true religion" idea. Everyone in hell is there b/c they want to be - they want to be their own savior and lord, and they don't want to be in heaven with God pushing them around. People go to hell b/c they want to be, people go to heaven b/c Jesus is there and they want to be with him.
Saturday, January 05, 2008
Jonathan Edwards' Resolutions
Got this in a email devotional and thought it might be applicable for anyone looking for some spiritually-focused resolutions to make for the new year:
He has showed you, O man, what is good. And what does the LORD require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God. (Micah 6:8, NIV)
From the Works of Jonathan Edwards (1703-1758), Vol. 1:
Being sensible that I am unable to do anything without God's help, I do humbly entreat Him, by His grace, to enable me to keep these Resolutions, so far as they are agreeable to His will, for Christ's sake.
[I will] remember to read over these Resolutions once a week:
1. Resolved, That I will do whatsoever I think to be most to the glory of God, and my own good, profit, and pleasure, in the whole of my duration; without any consideration of the time, whether now, or never so many myriads of ages hence.
2. Resolved, To do whatever I think to be my duty, and most for the good and advantage of mankind in general.
3. Resolved, Never to lose one moment of time, but to improve it in the most profitable way I possibly can.
4. Resolved, To live with all my might, while I do live.
5. Resolved, Never to do anything, which I should be afraid to do if it were the last hour of my life.
6. Resolved, Never to do anything out of revenge.
7. Resolved, Never to speak evil of any one, so that it shall tend to his dishonour, more or less, upon no account except for some real good.
8. Resolved, To study the Scriptures so steadily, constantly, and frequently, as that I may find, and plainly perceive, myself to grow in the knowledge of the same.
9. Resolved, Never to count that a prayer, nor to let that pass as a prayer, nor that as a petition of a prayer, which is so made, that I cannot hope that God will answer it; nor that as a confession which I cannot hope God will accept.
10. Resolved, To ask myself, at the end of every day, week, month, and year, wherein I could possibly, in any respect, have done better.
11. Resolved, Never to give over, nor in the least to slacken, my fight with my corruptions, however unsuccessful I may be.
12. Resolved, After afflictions, to inquire, what I am the better for them; what good I have got by them, and what I might have got by them.
13. Resolved, Always to do that which I shall wish I had done when I see others do it.
14. Let there be something of benevolence in all that I speak.
He has showed you, O man, what is good. And what does the LORD require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God. (Micah 6:8, NIV)
From the Works of Jonathan Edwards (1703-1758), Vol. 1:
Being sensible that I am unable to do anything without God's help, I do humbly entreat Him, by His grace, to enable me to keep these Resolutions, so far as they are agreeable to His will, for Christ's sake.
[I will] remember to read over these Resolutions once a week:
1. Resolved, That I will do whatsoever I think to be most to the glory of God, and my own good, profit, and pleasure, in the whole of my duration; without any consideration of the time, whether now, or never so many myriads of ages hence.
2. Resolved, To do whatever I think to be my duty, and most for the good and advantage of mankind in general.
3. Resolved, Never to lose one moment of time, but to improve it in the most profitable way I possibly can.
4. Resolved, To live with all my might, while I do live.
5. Resolved, Never to do anything, which I should be afraid to do if it were the last hour of my life.
6. Resolved, Never to do anything out of revenge.
7. Resolved, Never to speak evil of any one, so that it shall tend to his dishonour, more or less, upon no account except for some real good.
8. Resolved, To study the Scriptures so steadily, constantly, and frequently, as that I may find, and plainly perceive, myself to grow in the knowledge of the same.
9. Resolved, Never to count that a prayer, nor to let that pass as a prayer, nor that as a petition of a prayer, which is so made, that I cannot hope that God will answer it; nor that as a confession which I cannot hope God will accept.
10. Resolved, To ask myself, at the end of every day, week, month, and year, wherein I could possibly, in any respect, have done better.
11. Resolved, Never to give over, nor in the least to slacken, my fight with my corruptions, however unsuccessful I may be.
12. Resolved, After afflictions, to inquire, what I am the better for them; what good I have got by them, and what I might have got by them.
13. Resolved, Always to do that which I shall wish I had done when I see others do it.
14. Let there be something of benevolence in all that I speak.
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