In conversation with Chris and Mike P, we began discussing the list of 50 movies to see before you die, and promptly decided that it clearly did not reflect any kind of a good list of movies, at least for folks of our generation. In particular, where were the legendary guy movies that we grew up with?
A rudimentary Google search led me to the Men's Journal ranking of the 50 Best Guy Movies of All Time. While their list was fairly respectable, I still think it's slanted towards older films from the 60s, 70s, and 80s, while my generation (which is pretty much the same as everyone reading this blog) grew up on films in the 80s and 90s. I did think their list of criteria for a true guy movie was pretty accurate:
- violence trumps sex, war beats peace
- only guys will love the movie, can't be too serious or too sensitive (aka no Meryl Streep)
- can be watched in groups over and over
- great lines of dialogue that can be recited in public and other guys will glance over and nod with understanding
- tend to be about soldiers, athletes, cops, loners in general
- straightforward moral - all that matters is being brave and honorable
With that in mind, I'm going to kick off a list of guy movies, in no particular order or ranking, grouping movies in the same series together. I'll be pulling from movies that I've seen myself first. Keep in mind that while these movies might not be great, they might not even be good - but they will be guy movies. Feel free to add suggestions for the list in the comments section. (The first part of this list is sifted from the Men's Journal list).
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TOP GUY MOVIES
1. Die Hard trilogy - soon to add a fourth installment. These are often on FX, TBS, or TNT, and I almost always invariably stop to watch. It's so incredibly hilarious when the TV censorship/dubbing replaces McClane's trademark "Yippee ki-yay, m***********!" with "Yippee ki-yay, Mister Falcon!"
2. The Terminator and Terminator 2 - Terminator 3 doesn't count. The T-1000 may be one of the coolest villains in action movie history.
3. The Matrix - For the geek circles I run in, this flick has provided tons of quotes that can be used in multiple situations. "I know kung fu." "Whoa."
4. Enter the Dragon - Just adopt a slow, heavy Chinese accent, and say "You killed my family, and you have disgraced a Shao-Win Tempo."
5. Fight Club - One word: brutal.
6. Office Space - "It's not that I'm lazy, it's just that I don't care."
7. The Rock - "What do you want me to do, kill him again?" The shower room scene with the SEALs still gives me chills.
8. Face/Off - One of the first introductions of Hong Kong-stylized filmmaking - lots of slow-mo, trench coats billowing, the gold dragon money clip.
9. Commando - "I like you. You're funny. I'll kill you last."
10. Predator - "I ain't got time to bleed."
11. Lethal Weapon 1-3 - You can't get much more "guy" than relocating your own dislocated shoulder. However, the last line of #4 ("We're not friends, we're family!") is enough to trump Jet Li's coolness and wipe that movie off this list.
12. Desperado - Copious amounts of bullets and blood. Has anyone ever figured out how he hid two large-caliber pistols in his jacket sleeves?
13. Rambo: First Blood - Spawned gun-toting American stereotypes the world over.
14. Men in Black - Will Smith's inclusion on this list is a little iffy b/c his personal charisma is enough to bring in the ladies too. But still, the banter between him and Tommy Lee Jones is great.
15. Top Gun - It must have pleased Cruise greatly to be out-acted by the airplanes.
16. Ferris Bueller's Day Off - "Bueller? Bueller?" It still amuses me to see his buddy Cameron on the bus in "Speed".
17. Above the Law, Hard to Kill, and all the other three-word Seagal movies - there's something about watching a guy with a ponytail breaking people's arms in exquisite detail.
18. Bloodsport - You haven't seen guy movie martial arts until you've seen Bolo breaking a guy's neck and then flexing his pecs.
19. Swingers - "You're so money and you don't even know it."
20. Monty Python and the Holy Grail - "'Tis but a flesh wound!"
21. Robocop - ED-209 was the first live-action mecha.
22. Happy Gilmore - "The price is WRONG, Bob!"
23. Con Air (nominated by Chris) - The Nicolas Cage trilogy is complete.
24. Gladiator (nominated by Chris) - while it might just be too good of a movie for this list, you can't beat the mini-monologue/rant ending with "... and I will have my vengeance, in this life or the next."
25. Braveheart (nominated by Chris) - "Freeeeeeedoooooommmmm!" The graphic throat slitting scene still makes me cringe.
26. The Godfather 1 and 2 (nominated by Chris) - He actually nominated the entire series, but I understand that only 1 and 2 are really classics.
27. Scarface (nominated by Chris) - "Say hewo to ma leetle fwend!"
28. Rocky (nominated by Chris) - Did you know this won Best Picture and nominated Stallone for Best Actor and Best Screenplay? That's some kind of peak.
29. Goodfellas (nominated by Andrew N) - Gangsta.
30. Casino (nominated by Andrew N) - See #29.
31. The Untouchables (nominated by Andrew N) - Because baseball bats and spaghetti go together.
32. Full Metal Jacket, A Clockwork Orange, The Shining, and other Kubrick films (nominated by Andrew N)
33. Clint Eastwood's Spaghetti Western trilogy (nominated by Andrew N)
34. Bullit / Fast & Furious 1,2,3 (nominated by Andrew N) - For its shameless car porn.
35. Any James Bond movies NOT starring Roger Moore or Timothy Dalton (nominated by Andrew N)
36. Blues Brothers (nominated by Andrew N) - On a mission from God
37. Transformers: The Movie (nominated by Andrew N) - I can't believe I (Bob) forgot this one! How traumatic was it to see all your favorite Transformers dying?
38. Cool Hand Luke (nominated by AndrewN ) - Since he ate 50 eggs
39. Just about all Akira Kurosawa films with samurai (nominated by Andrew N)
40. Batman (1989) (nominated by Andrew N) - The only Batman movie not loved equally by girls, guys and girly guys
41. Army of Darkness (nominated by Andrew N) - Hail to the king, baby.
42. Tombstone (nominated by Andrew N)
43. The Professional (nominated by Andrew N)
44. Shaolin Soccer (nominated by Hanlin) - -1 vote
45. Iron Monkey (nominated by Hanlin)
46. Kill Bill 1 and 2 (nominated by Hanlin)
47. Snatch (nominated by Andrew W)
48. Lock, Stock, and Two Smoking Barrels (nominated by Andrew W)
49. Saving Private Ryan (nominated by Abe) - -1 vote
50. Black Hawk Down (nominated by Abe)
51. Glory (nominated by Abe) - -1 vote
52. Heat (nominated by Abe)
53. Raging Bull (nominated by Clement
54. Reservoir Dogs (nominated by Clement)
55. Animal House (nominated by Clement)
56. Field of Dreams (nominated by Cal)
57. Nothing to Lose (nominated by Abe) - "Why you gotta drive on the sidewalk man? People gotta walk there!"
58. Speed (nominated by Shally
NOMINATED BUT SHOT DOWN (3 or more votes)
The Princess Bride (nominated by Hanlin) - "Hallo. My name is Inigo MonTOya. You killed my father. Prepware to die."
Hanlin's reasoning: "i'd think that it's eccentric enough that gals won't really like it. the romantic stuff is too cheezy to take effect on girls. and no, princess bride doesn't have meryl streep in it."
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If you want anything struck from the list, vote for it in the comments - 3 votes will take it off!
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14 comments:
What about Princess Bride?
"My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Be prepared to die!" [repeats 5-7 times] "Will you stop saying that?!"
I know more guys who like this movie than gals.
can't forget "con air" to fill out the big three of nicolas cage movies ("rock" and "face/off" the other 2)... while the lines aren't as repeatable, there is still enough cheese and big explosions with one dimentional characters to make it a good guy movie :D
possible quote: "put... the bunny... back... in the... box. "
or little convo between cusak and cage:
cusak: "if you can't trust a south american drug lord, who can you trust?"
[silence]
cusak: "that was a joke."
cage: "i'm glad you told me."
anyways, i think we have a good start to our list. i'm sure there are a lot more "guy" movies. i'll comment more when i think of them :D
man... there are so many movies that i want to say, but there is a fine line between good guy movies and movies that simply sucked... i mean, i remember watching "double impact" in jr. high and that is a straight up guy movie. but it was so bad at the same time... well, actually most of van damme's movies were pretty bad (besides bloodsport)...
but that kinda leads to the other question of martial arts movies. these movies are definietly guy movies and made for guys, but where do you draw that line? there are a lot of jet li/jacky chan movies that i would say are "guy" movies and all of van damme and segal's cheesy movies are a mix of martial arts and guy action-type movies... anyways, jus some more thoughts as we try to perfect our list. haha
...
more suggestions:
"gladiator" and "braveheart" ... epic-type movies with grand scale battles move it into the likes of "star wars" and "lotr" which possibly too many girls like so we can't add to this "guys list" ... but i think "gladiator" and "braveheart" would fit nicely... i mean which guy hasn't tried to repeat crowe's mini-monologue of "my name is maximus decimus meridius, commander of the armies of the north, general of the felix legions, loyal servant to the true emperor, marcus aurelius. father to a murdered son, husband to a murdered wife. and i will have my vengeance, in this life or the next."
and of course braveheart's quotable quote of "freeeedoooom!"
and yes... i would also like to nominate adding "the godfather series" "scarface" and "rocky" to this list. reasons? there needs be no reason. "the godfather" is definietly a guy movie with the whole mob/family mentality. scareface with the famous line of "say he-llo to muy litt-e friend" and rocky running up the stairs and yelling "adriaaaaan" . you also have the whole hating the russians thing which was huge in the 80s. haha
and lastly... i'm hesitant to put "princess bride" on the list also. i see it more of a romantic comedy and i know a lot of girls who do like it. heh. great movie, but i dunno about a "guy" movie (though inigo montoya's quote is excellent)
ok... i've written too much here... i'll let other people have a chance to comment before i write more :D
i agree, princess bride is not a guy movie! lots of girls like princess bride.
inconceivable!
Updated the list. Sorry Hanlin, "The Princess Bride" has been kicked out with 3 or more votes.
Chris, to address your questions - first, I think the best barometer for whether a guy movie is too bad to be included is whether a group of guys would willingly watch it. I doubt many guys would watch Double Impact.
Second, I think martial arts movies are fine as long as the focus is on martial arts (i.e. Crouching Tiger wouldn't work since it's kinda character-driven).
On a thought of martial arts, how about Shaolin Soccer and Iron Monkey?
I would argue against The Godfather trilogy being guys only movies, because the movies feature more than just the mafia and the killing. They feature also family tension and feuds that carry some soap opera elements. The drama is definitely there. Plus, my mom likes the movies. :)
Oh, and any Quentin Tarantino movie can do, like Kill Bill.
Snatch and Lock, Stock, and Two Smoking Barrels
I saw Clockwork Orange once and don't ever want to see it again. Possibly will read the book though.
I have seen 37.5 of the 48 on your list so far.
Think the guy movie list needs a few more sports movies to give it some balance. Not that I'm saying add these to the list, but something like Days of Thunder, Field of Dreams, Major League, Waterboy, Rudy or Bend It Like Beckham.
Just kidding about the last one there. I think even Shaolin Soccer is borderline. The only soccer movie that might qualify for this list is Victory with Sly Stallone, but I've only watched it in Spanish, so I'm not completely sure about that one either.
whoa... how can this list not have any modern war movies, with only Full Metal Jacket being listed?? Glory? Saving Private Ryan? Black Hawk Down? Another one I'll toss in is HEAT, one of my all time favorites. And for old time's sake, Nothing to Lose =D "Oh yeah? Well here's a synonym for pro-creation... fuck you!" and plenty of other quotables.
I'm personally not a big fan of it, but I was pretty surprsed Pulp Fiction wasn't nominated.
btw, "Say hewo to ma leetle fwend!"??? I didn't know Elmer Fudd was in Scarface haha
i agree with abe... we forgot all about the war movies. "full metal jacket" should be added and "black hawk down." ... but "glory" and "saving private ryan" might be TOO good. haha... and i would add "heat" also. good call on that one.
calvin's idea of sports movies is good too, but i don't know which ones... and we also have all those crazy comedies like "dumb and dumber" (the toilet scene)
then there are all those movies that have high sexual content ("american pie"), but dunno if we want to be promoting those. haha.
"jabari!" hahahaha i'll have to tell maurice that one ... and speaking of maurice, i think he watches most of those movies you listed. .. such a dude :)
what about like...raging bull or reservoir dogs and animal house! haha "toga!toga!toga!". but yea i agree with calvin with the sports movies. Field of dreams is a classic. man i dont like baseball. but that movie is deep. mmm yea thats all i have to say
speed?
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